Can You Release Your "Shoulds?"

Happy Monday! I must admit that I'm cheating a bit by writing this post today -- it's the first day of my vacation. I should be relaxing. Or maybe not -- maybe my action fits well with the theme of this post: releasing your "shoulds." What am I talking about?

All the times you say to yourself: "I should have done ..." or "I shouldn't have done ..." Often, these self-talk statements lead to feelings of guilt and anxiety about a situation. And, by saying them, you can't change the situation (because we can't change the past -- try as hard as we might!). So, you've made yourself feel upset and stressed out.

What if, instead, you gave yourself permission to re-examine the situation and think of how you might do things differently in the future?

Last week, I had a conversation about this with Rebecca White, host of Heal Yourself Talk Radio. We talked about how “releasing the shoulds” can help you reduce guilt and manage your emotional responses to stress. We also discussed being more aware of your behavior patterns and recognizing their impact on your responses to stress. Our conversation is available for download from my Gcast podcast site and also accessible on Rebecca's website.

So, if I apply my approach to today -- I'm going to release my shoulds ("I should have worked longer last Friday and written this post then.") and accept that I'm blogging today. I will not feel guilty about sharing my experience with my blog community. I'd already made a mental note that I would wrap up a few loose biz ends today before embarking on my break. It's OK and I'm OK! :)

NEW Podcast with Stress Management Tips

I'm having what could be considered a stressful moment due to the storm in New York City last night -- limited subway service, 20-minute delay in car service, possible re-scheduling of a prospect meeting. But, I'm taking it all in stride and am using this "free" moment to let you know about my NEW podcast on managing your stress.

I recently was interviewed by Tim Mulvaney, founder of the Mulvaney Group. His company's mission is to "help fix the unfixable via Courageous Conversations." We talked about how our perception of stressful situations can sometimes heighten the stress we experience. The podcast has been uploaded to my Gcast site, and is also available to download from Tim's website. Also on his website is a downloadable copy of the Stress Coping Skills Ladder -- a tip sheet I created to help you monitor how you respond to stress (from counterproductive activities through to problem solving).

So, I'm trying to take my own advice now and stay at the top of the ladder -- focusing on making sure everyone I'm supposed to meet is aware that I might be late; checking email to see if my afternoon meeting has actually been cancelled; and blogging. You know, the actual act of writing this down seems to be calming me ... I think! :) ... Gotta go and call the car service!

Come Be a "Social-light" at Tavern on the Green

Want to experience ultimate networking at New York City's ultimate restaurant? Then, join me tomorrow (August 7) at Tavern on the Green from 7:00 - 11:30 PM.

The outdoor patio at Tavern on the Green is an urban oasis in the heart of Manhattan. What better venue to learn more about our Stress Management and Career Development programs? Hear from representatives of NYC's top social and personal growth organizations in a casual and fun atmosphere.

Tavern on the Green -- Outdoor Patio

West 67th Street & Central Park West

7:00 - 11:30 pm

$10 admission for prizes, specially-priced drinks/food and fun people!

Tips from Coaching & Mentoring Session: Part 2

No, you're not seeing double. This is another post about the Coaching & Mentoring session. In my last message, I forgot to give a shout-out to ANOTHER live blogger at our workshop. Also capturing thoughts, ideas and best practices was Barbara Rozgonyi, PR expert and Founder of CoryWest Media. Click HERE to read her post.

Being the marketing extraordinaire she is, Barbara's feed from the session was also picked up by another cool resource: Real Smart Women Mentorship Network. Thanks, Barbara!

Get Notes from the Coaching & Mentoring Session

I mentioned earlier that there were live bloggers who attended sessions at the BlogHer conference. These were some fast-typin', super-listenin' gals who basically transcribed what people were saying. At our Coaching & Mentoring session, our super-fast-blogger was Shannon McKarney, Proprietess (don't you just love that title!) of the ThreeSeven blog. Thanks, Shannon!

So, click HERE to get the transcript from our session. It will almost be like you were there because Shannon managed to capture our thoughts and audience interaction. You'll get to meet Elizabeth Perry (teacher & mentor), Liz Strauss (blog resource expert) and Wendy Piersall (home business expert). I shared results from the survey on Coaching & Mentoring. Liz and Wendy discussed their experience mentoring each other. And, we all shared tips on how to find mentors and define the mentoring relationship.

There was also some discussion about what to do when the coaching or mentoring relationship is NOT working. Read more ...

I'm Giving Broads an Advantage on Aug. 6

I'm excited that I've put the finishing touches on my 10 Tips to Make Your Net -- Work presentation. On Monday, August 6, I'll be speaking to a group of fantastic undergrad "broads" who are participating in the Broad Advantage summer program.

Broad Advantage is a one-week immersion in the professional world. My session on Networking is just one of many offered by fellow 85 Broad members and other dynamic speakers to help prepare these women for leadership and career success. We get to share tips and exchange ideas with 120+ college women who were accepted to participate in either the NYC or Los Angeles program.

This is just one of the many fantastic programs created by Janet Hanson (former leader at Goldman Sachs -- hence the name of the organization, which is the NYC address) and her team at 85 Broads. Founded in 1999 as a network for current and former GS female professionals, 85 Broads now has over 17,000 members worldwide. Their mission:

85 Broads is for women who appreciate the importance of relationships and who use every opportunity to leverage their own powerful networks on behalf of other women all over the world.

I can't wait to be make some great, new connections on August 6!